Wednesday, August 29, 2007

Boring

Question: If you absolutely had to vote for one of the democratic candidates for President, which one would it be? Art Holden, Manchester, New Hampshire

Answer: I think everyone knows how boring and meaningless I find these type of questions. However, several people have asked me this or something similar to this. Honestly, I think the candidates, from both political parties, are extremely weak this election. If I had to choose someone from the democratic side, I suppose it would be Joe Biden.

Friday, August 24, 2007

Don't confuse fantasy with reality

Question: I am a married mother of two wonderful little girls. I am 32 years old. I met, online, a man who is a 20-year-old college student. He is engaged to be married. I have talked with him on the phone several times. I have fallen in love with him. My husband is a nice man. I seriously do not know what to do. I dream of us being together. He lives almost 800 miles away but I have planned out several ways that we can get together. He told me upfront that he wants to have sex with me. I want to have sex with him so that is not a problem. I do not want to mess up things with my daughters. A friend told me of your blog and that is why I am writing you. What do you think I should do? Elsie W., St. Louis, Mo.

Answer: Elsie, at first I thought your question was a "joke" question. But several ladies at work assured me that it could certainly be real. My view is that it is not likely that anything good can come from this relationship. You say you don't want to mess up things with your daughters. If you separate them from their father, the nice man, you will be "messing things up." How old are your two girls? I don't know that I would trust a 20-year-old to be around young teen girls. I think that lust, not love, is the primary thing involved here. This man may have sexual intentions not only for you but also for your daughters. I think that sometimes we create fantasy situations in our minds. If those fantasies ever become reality, they almost always disappoint. Why would a 20-year-old college student want to get involved with a 32-year-old married woman with two children? Unless he sees an opportunity for a grand sexual adventure, what is the attraction? You live 800 miles away. Is he going to drop out of college and move to be with you? In the real world, the one of reality, none of this makes sense. You say you have fallen in love with him and yet, you have never met him. I love love. I am the last person to put down love. But this situation does not describe love to me. I am not saying that an older woman/younger man relationship cannot work out successfully or that two such people cannot be in love. But you two do not really truly know each other. What of your husband? What of your daughters? Do you give them up for this man? If you just want a sexual fling, I'm sure that there are plenty of men in St. Louis. Perhaps you want the sexual activity but by picking someone from so far away, you have found an "excuse" so that you cannot have the sexual activity. There are too many possibilities involved here. My advice is to see if you cannot find a way to fall in love with your husband all over again. Make him your sex slave or be his sex slave or whatever works for the two of you. Enjoy the life you have with your current family. Have fun with your husband and with your daughters. Have fun as a family. Don't spend any energy and time pining away for some man you don't even know. Leave him alone and don't ever look back and wonder, "what might have been?" That is only a fantasy. You have to live a real life in the real world. Don't confuse the two.
Elsie, I genuinely wish you a happy life.

Friday, August 10, 2007

Those are for non-thinking people

Question: I have been checking your blog for some time now. I have read all your answers ( really top-knotch stuff, Doc) and some of them several times. You haven't quit have you? I really enjoy reading your blog. Please keep writing it. Howie Kemp, Cleveland, Ohio

Answer: Thank you, Howie. No, I have not stopped answering questions. The problem has been that the majority of questions I have received lately involve politicians or celebrities. As you know from reading my other responses, I care very little for either group. Those who do seem interested in both groups are, in my view, generally among the non-thinking crowd. An individual with a gnat's brain might have some interest in what a politician might say now as he or she runs for political office. An individual with a gnat's brain might actually care about some movie starlet's latest date with some Hollywood "hunk." But for people who actually use their brains for thinking purposes, these two groups are a total waste of one's time. Now I do encourage everyone to vote. I vote. But there is absolutely no point in getting excited, one way or the other, about any potential candidate at this stage of the game. And it is all a big game. Most of it is a waste of time for everyone involved. Life is simply too brief for me to waste any of it on such nonsense. When people ask me questions about comments of specific politicians or about celebrities who are in rehab or who are divorcing, etc., I simply do not care. Consequently, I don't respond to such questions. Those items are for non-thinking people. Since I consider myself a thinking person, they do not interest me.